I started the journey when I was 19 years old, now I'm 22, and it's time to clean the basement. This is a collection of unreleased tracks and a raw demo of my former project - Darkwinged, for the 2 years that I was engaged in music in it. I upload these tracks here, with the original mixing, mastering and volume, largely for myself to leave in memory. These tracks will also not be on streaming services (at least most of them) Below is a LONG story of the foundation of the project and the formation of me as an artist.


Project history (including THE CRUCIFIX)

The path of my first project "Darkwinged" has come to an end. I started this project without even knowing about the existence of Synthwave and Darksynth, a year after I dropped out of music school with the words "I will never touch music again." Yes, it all started "for fun", and got bored pretty quickly. Then, one of the particularly bad evenings, when I quarreled with everyone I could with, I habitually sat down to "put green bricks in piano roll", and by the end of the night I realized that it turns out that it helps to cope with emotions.

Then it was difficult. It seemed to be 2019, and I didn't know anything about electronic music at all. Throughout my life I have listened to various music from Post hardcore and Melodic Death Metal to "The Ink Spots" and rap. I also don't know how to play musical instruments, so all I had left were free VST synthesizers, which I didn't know anything about. I began to write what I could - at first it was Future Bass, - I tried to do like my friend Dranlock (he brought me to synthwave). However, when I showed him the demo, he said it was "Synthwave". When I said I didn't know what it was, he looked at me like I was an idiot.

And then... I heard a Roller Mobster. Just imagine that having quite a lot of experience of listening to heavy music, I hear electronic music for the first time, and not something ordinary, but a Roller Mobster... It blew my mind. I immediately thought that I wanted to do the same, and from that moment I didn't seem to stop.

Then I accidentally got on the label, jokingly writing to them. They had certain requirements for synthwave, and since I was writing ordinary music, too fit into their framework. There I also met my great friend Acryl Madness, who also became my teacher. Albums were coming out, and the music was changing.

At some point after that, I began to understand music better. Being A REAL NERD (XD), I started listening to the orchestral ost of Dark Souls, and many other things like Japanese music, realising that it delights and inspires me. I wanted to write both orchestral and electronic music. And Gothic, and cyberpunk, and desert. There are so many things I like, but I can't choose one of the two. However, as you know, occult and religious themes are not new in Darksynth, so I tried to combine them (it turned into MODE DEMISE).

It's only now that I realise that I've been writing music as ambient artists all my life. I first see a picture in the head, and then I try to describe it with music. Around then I started creating plots and "God Hunter" appeared, followed by "Swordsman" and "Iron Will". There was a plot for each of these albums, and for God Hunter I even wrote 4 rather cringe-worthy, but large books.

By the way, the main reason why I stopped working with the first label was unformatted. I no longer fit into the concept of the label "synthwave", and besides, I felt some pressure from those who wrote "ordinary music". After all, I was and still am an ordinary guy even without muses, a school that tries to write ORCHESTRAL ELECTRONICS!!! By ear. (which sounds like madness to the past me).

It took a lot of work on myself to overcome the impostor syndrome. Several times I almost quit music because almost no one (as it seemed to me) understood my plots, which means I'm a shitty storyteller.

However, successfully surviving cancer, depression, and the paranoid fear of death that haunts me, combined with the desire to "leave something behind in this life" did not give me peace of mind, and I could not stop in any way. Besides, I have a painfully active mind. I just can't not write something. It will be music, or a book, but always some kind of plot.


And so, I'm here on THE CRUCIFIX project. I started this project with full awareness of what I want to do, how and why. I have a plot, and I describe it the way I want to. The genre is unimportant, the selection of instruments is unimportant. If I like the way it sounds, I'll use it. I also started listening to even more electronic music, and experimenting even more.

THE CRUCIFIX can be called a real beginning, while Darkwinged is a search for a way.

Although... Imho, a good musician, like a programmer, has been searching for a way all his life, and I am no exception. I'll try to keep the balance, but, youbcan always expect strange music.